Hello world. I am John Bohannon. Here is what happened:
| Experiment | Results |
| Follow a girl to Oxford | Broke up with the girl, but got a PhD in molecular biology |
| Become a correspondent for Science | Explored the world, wrote many stories |
| Create the “Dance Your PhD” contest | Performed at TEDxBrussels in 2011 (and in 2012 at TED) |
| Become a visiting scholar at Harvard Medical School and then embed with military forces in Afghanistan | Engineer the first ever voluntary release of civilian casualty data by the military and the United Nations |
| Test whether people can distinguish the taste of paté versus dog food | Cause Stephen Colbert to eat cat food on television |
| Help write “Green Porno” with Isabella Rossellini | Caused Jon Stewart to share his fear of bedbugs on the Daily Show |
| Work with the Google ngrams team on data representing 5% of all books ever published | Created the Science Hall of Fame |
| Submit hundreds of fake papers to fee-charging open-access scientific journals | Revealed that 60% of them are not doing peer review |
| Do a chocolate weight-loss study and p-hack the data | Triggered a junk science media orgy |
| Work with the hacker in (probably) Russia who runs Sci-Hub to publicly release a dataset of 28 million downloads | Created a global reading map of the world's largest illegal library |
| Join my friend Sean Gourley's tech startup Primer | Help people such as Wikipedians and intelligence analysts make fewer mistakes |